WASHINGTON - Secretary of State John Kerry today showed reporters how he would theoretically shake hands with an Iranian official, but stopped short of grabbing a hypothetical arm as well in a gesture of friendship.

"The arm thing is reserved for friendly nations only," Kerry explained.  "You shake right hands here, like this, then reach out to the person's right arm with your left hand and grab it somewhere above the elbow, like this.  That way the other country feels you really support them and have their back," Kerry explained.  "There's no way I'm doing that to anyone from the Iranian government."

The Secretary then also denied there would be any double handshaking -- in which both hands are closed over the same hand of the Iranian official -- and certainly "no hugging under any foreseeable set of events."

Reporters then asked about back patting, to which the Secretary was equally adamant.  "There will be NO back padding with any Iranian official, under any circumstances," Kerry said.  "The back thing is for friendly nation-states only, and its use is strictly monitored by other Secretary of States all over the world.  Not going to happen."

On the subject of plane greeting, the Secretary was equally passionate.  "I won't be meeting any Iranian official getting off of any plane, in any way, shape or form," Kerry explained.  "In fact, my staff is currently looking into whether or not any Iranians could meet ME getting off a plane.  We're pretty sure they can't but we're still looking into that."