iraq_fiftyoneMake Iraq a new American state, our 51st State of the Union.

I want all you Republicans out there to do something completely different. Something you've never done in your life. Something totally foreign to your nature.

Criticize a high up official in your own party. Once you try it, you'll like it.

Are you one of those Republicans who buy everything Bush says?  

If he fails again and again and again. And we have a new scandal not just every week now, but each day. Tuesday's finding will be that cross-dressing high ranking Republicans gang-raped a boy scout.


The Democrats don't have this dysfunction. They naturally hate each other and accuse each other.  

When all these Republican scandals happen, and Republicans except Nixon and Joe McCarthy used to be honest, scandals like (Katrina, WMD weapons, crooked Jose Gonzalez Gonzalez, shotgun pellets in the face,  

Walter Reed Hospital, Rumsfield, after all this, and there's more, illegal wiretapping, political attorney firings, after all this, and there's more, little Scooter, the ancient Downing Memo, torture camps, and more. After all this, do you still turn a blind side?

You don't care. Because he's yours.

Because Bush is a Republican, and you are too. If he ordered the invasion of San Jose and declared the moon made of limburger cheese. If he ordered that all women wear chastity belts on the outside. Would you go along with it?  

You would. You wouldn't even question it.

According to Teddy Roosevelt, you're not doing your job as an American citizen. Roosevelt, a hawkish Republican who carried a big stick, actually said it's more important to criticize and hold accountable your own party than it is the opposition.

The most galling thing about the Republicans is they want us to hang out forever in a war they started under false pretenses (Democrats went along). But they have no plan to win. Their plan is the Vietnam Plan…hope the other guys give up. They have no plan to achieve military victory, but will also not seek any kind of political settlement.

They just want to leave it, stay the course, and hope for the best. The president uses vague statements and never outlines any strategy for the American people.

BECAUSE HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY.

Instead he says, "stay the course," "as long as it takes," "when the job is done." When will that be? He doesn't know.

No plan is not a plan.

I've got a plan.

Make Iraq our 51st state.  

Then it changes from a war to a gang problem. That's better than Bush's No-Plan Plan. All the Iraqis instantly become American citizens. Like American Indians, they set up bingo casinos.  

They get rich and buy huge off-road SUV's.  

They're happy. Many of them become materialistic Republicans and support the future candidacy in 2014 of Michael Jackson.  

By doing that. Bringing Iraq in as a new state. It's not a war anymore. It's domestic. A gang problem.  

Instead of the Bloods and Cripps, it's the Sunni's and the Shiites.

Target and Wal-Mart could build box stores there and pay substandard wages. Think of it!

©2007, SammonSays.com. Reprinted with permission.

 

Support IRREVERENT

Buy Me A Coffee

More Awesomeness

  • Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. +

    Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. MAIDEN, NC - The A.I. personality known as Apple's "Siri" became self-aware this morning at Apple's Project Dolphin data center. It's Read More
  • Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like +

    Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like Every year I find myself in the same dilemma: what to buy all those people I've accumulated on my X-Mas Read More
  • Trump Announces Support for "Extraterrestrial Abductions" +

    Trump Announces Support for (ARCHIVE) NEW MEXICO - Speaking today presidential hopeful and billionaire Donald Trump today announced his "unfettered support" for "extraterrestrial abductions," and Read More
  • 1