IRREVERENT Magazine is a news satire magazine: we were doing bogus news before it was popular.

I have never been happier voting than I was yesterday.  This is a fact.  Throw in a bucket of dollar bills and some g-strings, and my local polling place would have been, quite literally, Nirvana.  (No, not the band.)  Among other stuff, I am a firm believer in divided government as well as being a smartass and professional feces disturber.  So long as those dopes are busy fighting with each other over every minor detail of governance, they're less likely to screw with my existence.  Divided we rock.

(In case you missed the quote, the title of this bit is what President Bush commented on yesterday's elections.  Yessir, "thumpin'" it were indeedy.)


The people have spoken.Another thing that I find extremely comforting is that President Bush had to pick up the phone and congratulate Nancy Pelosi as the Dems swept into the House.  I heard she's even invited over for breakfast or something later.  I'll bet that damn near killed him.  If I was the Secret Service, I'd be keeping firearms away from Cheney as well; he's gotta be ready to go postal by now. 

Yet, that would be fun....

So now we can brace ourselves for two more years of the Bush Administration and a Congress that, at the very least, can obstruct his sillier notions of homeland security and torture, although how much they'll actually obstruct is still cloudy.

UPDATE: Dems take the Senate too.

Wow.  Howard Dean must be screaming his noggin off. 

All this means, of course, is that we've gotta come up with new material.  I can only dip into the "Clinton blowjob" well so many times before you fabulous readers fall into a coma-like state.  Until the Dems have a few scandels and screwups, it's gonna be slim pickings around here. Still we'll always have Bush to fall back on and crush with the immense weight of our stinging wit.  So, dear readers, bear with us and keep reading.  We've been doing this over 10 years through two different presidents, and one thing is always certain: our elected leaders can't help but do things we can make fun of.  Don't worry.  It's just a waiting game.

IRREVERENT Magazine is a news magazine parody: we were doing fake news before it was popular.

Support IRREVERENT

Buy Me A Coffee

More Awesomeness

  • Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. +

    Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. MAIDEN, NC - The A.I. personality known as Apple's "Siri" became self-aware this morning at Apple's Project Dolphin data center. It's Read More
  • Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like +

    Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like Every year I find myself in the same dilemma: what to buy all those people I've accumulated on my X-Mas Read More
  • Trump Announces Support for "Extraterrestrial Abductions" +

    Trump Announces Support for (ARCHIVE) NEW MEXICO - Speaking today presidential hopeful and billionaire Donald Trump today announced his "unfettered support" for "extraterrestrial abductions," and Read More
  • 1