WASHINGTON - Today we're almost positive President Trump held a press conference, based on the fact that he was standing in front of a podium and a bunch of people were surrounding him. Plus we heard other reports call it a "press conference" but we're pretty sure they were guessing.
He talked about a lot of things, including broad reflections on active shooters, scumbags in the F.B.I., scumbags in the Democratic Party, scumbags who don't agree with him, pausing occassionally to pile generous praise upon the semi-shocked supporters surrounding him, who were nudged mere moments before so they woke and stood up.
We're not sure what the point of the event actually was. "I don't know what that was," added Jim Brown, a political correspondent for the Inside Washington Politics news program. "At one point I think he talked about fly fishing, baseball and maybe hunting or something, but it was too hard to follow in any logical sense."
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