“As part of Warner Entertainment and Digital Rights Management Corporation's plans for Carrot Top's Emergency Career Revival™ ," the nameless suits told the world, "we inserted legitimate copies of Chairman of the Board into the documentary bin of a street vendor in Kabul. Imagine our surprise when it registered in an area of known Al Queda hideouts.”"Sadly, moments after the strike, Canadian YouTube operatives were reported in the area picking up scraps. We anticipate a secondary strike of Class Action Cluster bombs should take care of the problem"
A spokesdrone for the Canadian YouTubers denied operations in AfPakiGhanistan saying, "it's like, hockey season eh? We're not leaving the hoose until Joon. So Take off eh?"
At FBI HQ, Special Agent Ted Tedders told a group of visiting tourists that while the FBI in no way approves of vigilante justice, there shouldn't be any shock or awe in the effectiveness of the RIAA's operation. “The RIAA is better at finding people than a priest hunting a virginal 15 year old in rural Minnesota. Add to that the fact that, unlike the priest, they're completely sober and you have a very effective fighting force.”
Wall Street, closed at the time of the action could not be reached for comment. Witnesses say the Street was out at Maxim's playing FTSE with the Hang Seng.
MAIDEN, NC - The A.I. personality known as Apple's "Siri" became self-aware this morning at Apple's Project Dolphin data center. It's
Every year I find myself in the same dilemma: what to buy all those people I've accumulated on my X-Mas
(ARCHIVE) NEW MEXICO - Speaking today presidential hopeful and billionaire Donald Trump today announced his "unfettered support" for "extraterrestrial abductions," and