IRREVERENT News

ALASKA - Recently resigned Alaska governor Sarah Palin has reportedly contacted self-professed "super-M.I.L.F." pornographer Cezar Capone, several times to see if his 2008 offer of $2 million to appear in an adult film was "still an option."

"If my time in the public eye has taught me anything at all," Palin said in her backyard as a moose walked through her garden, "it's that I like being watched. And two million bucks is nothing to sneeze at, especially for doing something to my husband that I already do on his birthday for free."

Cezar Capone Productions has refused the former governor's calls but did issue a brief statement on their website "super-milf-mummahumpy.com":

We are flattered that Mrs. Palin is now open to our offer, but regret that the market has not developed in the "Palin porn" arena as we had hoped. We wish you the best of luck in your future endevors [sic]. Yours, C.C.

Undeterred, Palin has reportedly contacted "other major pornographers," including Vivid Entertainment to guage interest. As of this writing, none had taken up the former governor's offer. Vivid's Steven Hirsch went as far as faxing his hand-written response -- "thanks but no thanks" -- to Mrs. Palin personally, followed by a heartbreaking "LOL."

"This is definitely a first in American politics," noted Dr. Jim Jingleheimer, professor of current American politics for Harvard University. "First, resign for no apparent reason, then try to break into porn movies only to be roundly rejected, all in the span of two days around the 4th of July; that has to be a unique experience in the history of politics, well outside Clinton at least."