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  • Aliens Land on White House Lawn:

    Aliens Land on White House Lawn: "We're done screwing around!"

    We're "done screwing around with backwoods hicks" or "other equally unreliable witnesses" that end up "going nowhere," said the aliens. Read More
  • Nodding Off on Notting Hill

    Nodding Off on Notting Hill

    Because misery loves company and married people desperately needed a holiday to celebrate themselves. Read More
  • Largest Loch Ness Investigation Ends, Produces Cool Artist Interpretation of Monster

    Largest Loch Ness Investigation Ends, Produces Cool Artist Interpretation of Monster

    "We did, however, have a lovely time out on the water: it is quite beautiful." Read More
  • Ok Boomer

    Ok Boomer

    “Boomer”? Really? Me? Read More
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  • Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. +

    Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. MAIDEN, NC - The A.I. personality known as Apple's "Siri" became self-aware this morning at Apple's Project Dolphin data center. It's Read More
  • Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like +

    Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like Every year I find myself in the same dilemma: what to buy all those people I've accumulated on my X-Mas Read More
  • Trump Announces Support for "Extraterrestrial Abductions" +

    Trump Announces Support for (ARCHIVE) NEW MEXICO - Speaking today presidential hopeful and billionaire Donald Trump today announced his "unfettered support" for "extraterrestrial abductions," and Read More
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