WASHINGTON – Things were quiet today in the U.S. Senate as no legislative business was scheduled, leaving C-SPAN to play quiet, classical music and staffers to wander around gossiping and drinking coffee. Most fell into one or more hours of Candy Crush.

Nothing happened today.  Zippo.“Nope nothing to report,” said Senior Legislative Analyst Sean Young, who I bumped into wandering around the chamber. “Nothing on the docket, nothing discussed, no debate, no actual senators showed up or did anything.” Idly tossing his yo-yo toward the floor and pulling it back up, Young continued, “Nope, can’t even find anything mildly interesting on the [congressional] twitter feeds.”

Wall Street reacted in no way to the senate’s lack of activity, instead occupying itself with three hours of Pokémon Go around Manhattan, before stopping for lunch at Yves on Greenwich Street.


New WHO Warning


Buy Me A Coffee

More Awesomeness

  • Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. +

    Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. MAIDEN, NC - The A.I. personality known as Apple's "Siri" became self-aware this morning at Apple's Project Dolphin data center. It's Read More
  • Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like +

    Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like Every year I find myself in the same dilemma: what to buy all those people I've accumulated on my X-Mas Read More
  • Trump Announces Support for "Extraterrestrial Abductions" +

    Trump Announces Support for (ARCHIVE) NEW MEXICO - Speaking today presidential hopeful and billionaire Donald Trump today announced his "unfettered support" for "extraterrestrial abductions," and Read More
  • 1