Forget all that nonsense about creeping socialism and being a traitor because of health care when you already get Social Security and a hundred other government and state-run benefits including your driver’s license and don’t care a fig about those.

Forget that the government you now condemn as “subversive” you made a living off of, and now draw a retirement check from.

This is all about who is white.

I call for the formation of a new political party, The Albino Party.

This is a party for only the whitest of the white. Forget that human beings first started in Africa. Forget that the Roman Empire was an ad-mixture of intermixing tangled up with European, African and Mediterranean races. Forget that during the Hunnish barbarian invasions of the 5th Century,

People interbred over a shifting huge area of Asia, Africa and Europe, people who had no compunction about who was what color.

Forget it!

The Albino Party is for people who can prove they are a pure strain of Nordic white uninterrupted by any intermingling for at least 5,000 years. First of all, we take a collection of contributed money and form an expeditionary party to journey to Mongolia and discover ancient pots with swastika symbols on them. This will prove we are the end result of ten millenniums of perfect breeding with no non-white blood.

Adam was white after all. Every Hollywood Genesis movie shows him as blonde and white.

We study birth certificates.

As members of the Albino Party, we need a candidate. I know he’s too socialistic and seems reluctant to burn crosses on people’s lawns, but hear me out. Let’s consider John McCain. Sure, he lost last time.

But look at him. He’s got white hair, shining white teeth made possible by the kind of dental care only senators have, and skin so white it practically glows in the dark. He looks like Hopalong Cassidy. If we could get Sarah Palin to run again with him, she could bring with her all the patriot reactionary heroes who have kept their white blood pure by living in woods unfettered by filthy, stinking cities and their sub-humans.

After all, you ever see a black lumberjack or moose hunter? I highly doubt it.

The Albino Party is not racist. We are simply trying to show that like different breeds of dogs have different IQ’s (a poodle is smarter than an Irish setter), people are the same.

Trying to make out that people aren’t different is socialistic, communistic engineering and political correctness.

This is a party for those who believe in differences, exclusions, and separateness.

God knows it, and God is white, like us. If God had intended Jews to be equal for example, he would not have made them suffer throughout history.

Would he? God is a man, and a Republican.

Now, is that racism? I ask you.

The whitest of white people are the smartest, and should run things. The founding Fathers knew this. Non-white people have thicker skulls and smaller brains, and this is what makes them better boxers. George Washington would have told you so.

We study skulls.

Now, if this isn’t reasonable, we of The Albino Party don’t know what is.

Membership forms are available at the door as you leave.


Buy Me A Coffee

More Awesomeness

  • Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. +

    Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. MAIDEN, NC - The A.I. personality known as Apple's "Siri" became self-aware this morning at Apple's Project Dolphin data center. It's Read More
  • Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like +

    Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like Every year I find myself in the same dilemma: what to buy all those people I've accumulated on my X-Mas Read More
  • Trump Announces Support for "Extraterrestrial Abductions" +

    Trump Announces Support for (ARCHIVE) NEW MEXICO - Speaking today presidential hopeful and billionaire Donald Trump today announced his "unfettered support" for "extraterrestrial abductions," and Read More
  • 1