MILWAUKEE - Mid-level manager Billy Simpson today spoke all day long on the phone discussing things, but actually got nothing done.
Simpson, however, was exhausted at the end of the day. "I knocked off around 4pm," he said, "completely exhausted. I got a lot of things going today, and just need to keep all the balls in the air. Overall, it was a good day."
Coworkers sitting next to Simpson, though, had a different take. "He didn't get anything accomplished today at all," noted Bernie Shoemaker, one of Simpson's peers. "His team doesn't do anything, and neither does he. Frankly I'm shocked he hasn't been fired."
Nevertheless, well placed sources within the company have confirmed that not only is Simpson not in danger of losing his job, he is due to be promoted "any day now." Simpson's coworkers and peers reacted swiftly when hearing the news.
[inset pos=right]They must know what they're doing promoting him, right?[/inset]"I can't believe it!" said Jaime Weathers, one of Simpson's peers. "He's been here two years LESS than me! If anyone deserved that promotion it's me not that slacker!"
"That moron?!" yelled coworker Bob Smith. "Man, it's so true: it's not what you know, it's who you ****!"
Simpson's team, however, was more positive. "Well, if he gets promoted, then I have a shot at getting his old job," noted Veronica Flicker, widely considered Simpson's "second in command." "Everyone knows he [Simpson] doesn't do anything. They must know what they're doing promoting him, right?"
Photo Credit: Helder Almeida
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