WASHINGTON - Today U.S. Defense Secretary Leon Panetta admitted "grave worries" over Punxsutawney Phil's prediction of "six more weeks of winter."
"We are currently studying the ramifications in many different dimensions," said Panetta, his face pinched in worry. "However, I can tell you," Panetta added, crinkling his nose, "I am deeply, deeply worried."
Expanding on his remarks with his trademark bloodhound "Leo" at his side, a sour-faced Panetta explained that he was "extremely, amazingly worried" about Phil's prediction due to it's possible impact to "all current U.S. military operations" as well as it "simply being very troubling." "In short, I am very worried and will continue to monitor the situation, and every single possible outcome, in every conceivable way that I can, losing days of sleep in the process," said a very worried Panetta, squinting and making his best worried face.
Deputy Secretary of Defense Ashton Carter echoed Panetta's worry. "I, myself, have not stopped thinking about the [Punxsutawney Phil] prediction since I was briefed by Secretary Panetta himself this morning. He was extremely worried about this, and many other things, and that just made the rest of the leadership worried too."
"It's not the first time he'd [Sec. Panetta] mentioned the groundhog thing," said Joint Chiefs of Staff Chairman General Martin Dempsey. "He's perpetually worried about something. To be honest, he really should try to lighten up."
Photo: DoD
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