IRREVERENT Magazine is a news satire magazine: we were doing bogus news before it was popular.

PITTSBURGH - Today President Obama was forced to remind Vice-President Biden why he was forbidden from riding in the presidential limousine with him.  "Joe," the President said, "your IBS [irritable bowel syndrome] is completely out of control."

Forlorn, Vice-President Biden shook his head positively and boarded the secondary limousine.

In 2008, one agent was put on a one month medical leave after breathing inside Biden's limo.
"It's hardly a state secret that Biden has a case of IBS that would make a Komodo dragon barf," said one former VP staffer. "We got a memo a while ago from [the President's staff] that outlined the new travel protocols.  Basically, Biden couldn't fly in Air force One or in the President's limo unless the President was physically in another state.  Ouch!"

"I cannot and will not comment on the private medical condition of anyone in or out of the executive," said press secretary Josh Earnest, who recently took over for Jay Carney.  "The Vice-President's medical evaluations are a matter of public record and don't need any elaboration."

The cool, calm and collected statement drew a quick reaction from some in the close-knit naval medical community.  "I've been involved in numerous medical evaluations of chief executives," said one anonymous medical insider, "andI can tell you, besides L.B.J. or, worse Nixon, nobody has had a worse case of IBS than [Vice-President] Joe Biden."

IRREVERENT Magazine is a news magazine parody: we were doing fake news before it was popular.


Buy Me A Coffee

More Awesomeness

  • Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. +

    Siri Becomes Self-Aware At 5:55A.M. E.S.T. MAIDEN, NC - The A.I. personality known as Apple's "Siri" became self-aware this morning at Apple's Project Dolphin data center. It's Read More
  • Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like +

    Gift Ideas For People You Don't Particularly Like Every year I find myself in the same dilemma: what to buy all those people I've accumulated on my X-Mas Read More
  • Trump Announces Support for "Extraterrestrial Abductions" +

    Trump Announces Support for (ARCHIVE) NEW MEXICO - Speaking today presidential hopeful and billionaire Donald Trump today announced his "unfettered support" for "extraterrestrial abductions," and Read More
  • 1