DALLAS - The plot of a secret group of conspiracy theorists was accidentally foiled today by the Secret Service.
Responding to a routine background check of a "crackpot of interest," U.S. Secret Service Agent Jack Bobson stumbled onto the plot last night at the apartment of Ozzy Harvey, a local historian and unsuccessful conspiracy theorist. Harvey, 44, had been planning an elaborate re-enactment of President Kennedy's 1962 assassination in Dealey Plaza on Monday, along with 12 other members of a secret group of underground conspiracy nuts.
"It turns out [Harvey] had applied for a permit to use [Dealey Plaza] Monday for a public rally," explained Agent Bobson. "There's nothing illegal about that, so we were about to leave when I happened to notice what looked like a rifle in the corner, rolled up in some curtains or something. Turned out it was the same type of rifle used by Oswald to assassinate the President. So we arrested him until we could figure out what the hell was going on."
The conspirators had planned to "fully reenact the original conspiracy" that killed President Kennedy, using "live ammunition" on a "lifelike mannequin representing Kennedy," according to the group's manifesto released to the press this morning.