EVERYWHERE - After the rollercoaster of press surrounding Sheen, everyone is plain sick of him.
"I don't care about what [Sheen] did today, what he tweeted to whom or what it was about," confessed Jack Cassidy, a random person we polled in downtown Chicago. "I don't care about his webcam show, where he lives, or who he's [having intercourse with]. I thought it was bad enough when every other word out of the press had either 'wiki' or 'leaks' in them. This is beyond stupid."
"Bravo," said Jennifer Talbot, a P.R. executive at an exclusive Beverly Hills publicity firm. "He executed the playbook perfectly. People love it when millionaire celebrities fall flat on their asses, and it's a great strategy to avoid being fired or brought up on charges. I'd love to take credit for it, but I'm not running his publicity this month. Sheen has single-handedly pushed the art of public relations ahead by decades, all in the past month or so. I wish I could bottle him up and stick him on the shelf for the rainy season, or sweeps."
When asked about their reaction, many people around the world responded with a quizzical, "Who?" or "I thought that show was cancelled YEARS ago."